Why do the words not come out as they sound in my head?
“I had it all figured out in my head. I knew exactly what I was going to say! Practiced it over and over in my head! But for some reason, it didn’t come out anything like I’d practiced! Why can’t I articulate my thoughts clearly?”
I can’t tell you how many times a day I hear these sentiments!Ā
If you struggle to articulate your thoughts, you’re not alone!
The process of thinking thoughts in your mind is very different from the process of expressing them.
Picture this: You’re working on a project. It’s brilliant. The client will benefit; it’ll be better than anything your competition can drum up. You even practice what you’re going to say in your head.
You’re really excited about expressing your thoughts!
Then the words don't come out as you thought them!
Now here you are at the meeting, you open your mouth, words come out, but you’re looking at blank faces. Nobody seems to understand what you’ve just said.
Five minutes later, Daria says the same thing and gets all the credit!
For some reason you may have used too many words–you said the same thing three different ways. Or maybe the words just got garbled. Or maybe it was full of filler words.
Or: You’re conveying your message, but it’s coming out all Speedy Gonzalez or too high-pitched. It’s not perceived as confident or credible, and people have difficulty processing your words. That’s not going to get you where you need to go!
You have crystallized ideas in your mind, but getting them out is challenging. How can this be?!
Not being able to organize & articulate your thoughts is normal.
Now you just have to do something about it. Learn the techniques to expressing your thoughts–the process of taking your gorgeous ideas from your head to theirs! Read on and you’ll learn how to do it š
Techniques to articulate your thoughts aloud.
You know people who appear credible and are super influential. They speak, and people are magnetized and engaged. They know how to speak up in meetings and they have a strong verbal brand. Who are these people? Are they from Mars? Another galaxy?
No. They’ve learned and mastered the techniques to speak well. Once you learn the techniques you’re a confident superstar. You become trustworthy and credible.
A crisp, clear speaking voice and powerful executive presence are essential to being an incredible communicator.
You can follow the techniques until you don’t have to anymore. They are designed to become a habit in your life.
You’re doing an incredible job. But no one knows it if you can’t articulate it.
I know you’re out there doing your job to the best of your ability. You’re giving it your all and your stuff is good. But no one’s going to know it if you can’t articulate it.
Let’s do it together! I recommend you reach out to us and get started with a personalized course, or if you’re a DIY type, take The Voice Spa. The Voice Spa teaches you to use a magnetic voice, speak concisely and at the perfect pace, and be authoritative and persuasive, yet warm and engaging.
Not being able to articulate one's thoughts happens to almost everyone.
My clients all think they’re the only ones who don’t articulate their thoughts into words. I swear. When I meet people for a consult they describe it to me as if I’ve never heard it before. And if it’s 5 pm I’ve heard it 11 times that day already.
So I said “almost” everyone but I really mean everyone.
I don’t know why people don’t talk about it with each other, but there you are. Thinking you’re all alone and meanwhile, everyone’s going through the same thing!
Well, read on to find out how to articulate your thoughts into words. Then share it with your friends. They’ll thank you!
9 Secret Steps to Influencing Others
Want to be more influential? We all want to communicate our most important messages in a way that encourages others to take action. Whether that action is voting for our candidate or picking up milk from the store, the words we use and how we speak play a huge role in getting the job done.
Why do your words not come out as they sound in your head?
Mystery solved.
We can have ideas crystalized in our minds; however, conveying them to others involves translation. We have to translate our ideas so our listeners may easily perceive them.
Remember: your thoughts are well-cemented in your mind because of all of the experiences you’ve had and the pictures you see.Ā
You could be trying to explain yourself to your identical twin with whom you’ve had the same experiences for your whole life, and you still may have a misunderstanding.
Express your thoughts by translating your ideas into words.
Now imagine you’re the CTO explaining something to the CEO. Identical twins? Very far from it. Almost none of the same experiences and no same “mind images” or even knowledge. You depend on each other with your different proficiency bases.
(When I talk about pictures in our minds, I mean that when we learn the names of objects or concepts throughout our lives, we draw pictures in our minds. A simple example is if I grew up with a German Shephard and you grew up with a Shihtzoh. Our mind’s images of “dogs” would be different. It’s neuroscience.)
Then the connections in your mind are different from others’ minds. It may be easy for you to draw a particular conclusion and perhaps not the same for someone else. They may be drawing different conclusions.
How to articulate your thoughts into words.
- Learn how to make a high-stakes situation into one where you don’t worry about the outcome. How do we do that? We do that byĀ removing the impact that fight-or-flight has on our bodies.Ā You’ll need to learn toĀ be relaxed in high-stakes situations and treat them as low-stakes.
Ā - Turn your message into your narrative. Redesign it a few times and make itĀ YOUR STORY. The concepts you want to share should roll off your tongue (in different ways) in every type of milieu you find yourself in.
Ā - Articulate your complex ideas more simply. Deliver your message in chunks or bullets. You mustĀ be conciseĀ with your message so others can process it quickly. People’s brains are working hard for them to survive and thrive. If it’s too difficult to process your message, their brains check out. You can see it in their eyes.Ā
Ā - Ask for confirmation. When you’ve completed conveying a concept, ask if you’ve explained it well. Don’t ask if your listeners understand; that’s off-putting.
Ā - Speak slowly. If you practice these tips toĀ slow down your speech, you’ll sound completely natural, and you won’t lose any time. š This is all part of being an incredible communicator at work.
Ā - Record yourself and assess. It’s not shameful not to be aĀ perfect communicator. Anyone you know who’s excellent has worked on it! Be a scientist and make those improvements in your ability to convey your thoughts into words. If you put as much time into improving your speaking game as you do your tennis/golf game, you might go places. Love you!Ā Ā Ā Ā
You can express yourself brilliantly.
And reap the benefits.
My friends, not only can you get your message across as well as it sounded in your head when you were silently practicing your soliloquy, but you can be even better.
You can be incredibly engaging and influential.Ā
To this day, and I’ve been doing this for a long time, people I meet still don’t know just how well they can become at developing relationships, influencing others, passionately expressing their ideas.
Learning how to speak clearly is integral to relationship building, getting a job, dating, absolutely anything that involves opening your mouth to speak.
You'll be powerful & persuasive when you articulate your thoughts well.
Most of the time, the only thing standing in the way is you. People often think it’s impossible to improve their messaging delivery.
Do you ever think: I’ve been speaking my whole life I should be awesome at it already?
Then why did Alexander the Great learn communication skills from Aristotle from childhood until he took over the world? He was an incredible orator. Persuasion? He knocked it out of the park.
Throughout history, kids learned the art of conversation, rhetoric, introductions, the science of being persuasive, and the list goes on until just 200 years ago. The main focus of education until college was communicating clearly and persuasively.
Don’t believe me? Just look at Patrick Henry’s entire speech before he said, “Give me liberty or give me death.”
Ā
All day long, people tell me they can't articulate their thoughts into words.
And they each think they’re the only one!
It’s incredible after I speak to someone for the first time, and they tell me that people don’t listen and don’t follow their call to action.
Then, when I tell them that this problem belongs to everyone I’ve ever met, they’re always shocked. And then I’m shocked that they’re shocked! š
I listen to 15 people per day tell them the same thing! And 20 more are writing it in an email or the Contact Us form. Guys! You are not alone. This is a common problem!
An Introduction to Accent Reduction
This brief introduction will get you started on the road to speaking Standard American English.
Confident and persuasive is the only way to go through life.
The fact is that not only can you make people want to listen to you and do what you say, but you can become confident and persuasive in every situation you find yourself.
My clients become sought after. They practice with me. They work on the techniques in the systematic fashion that I give them. And they become quite desirable. They don’t need to look for jobs or even interview. Because people reach out to them!
You can do this yourself with The Voice Spa video course. Or you can get in touch with us for individual sessions.
If you’re bootstrapping it on your own, click through the links in this article to learn the specifics. You can use that technique throughout this blog.
Want to easily articulate your thoughts into words? The Voice Spa will train you.
The Voice Spa first teaches you to be habitually relaxed in all high-stakes situations. You’ll be ultra-confident and cool as a cucumber being interview on Bloomberg or GMA. You’ll be smooth as silk during an interview or on Shark Tank š
Next, you learn to use a concise speaking style. Then I teach you the techniques to being authoritative & persuasive and how to articulate your thoughts into words. I give you lots of practice.
You’ll learn to use a back resonance which gives you a very professional and authoritative sound. Your voice will be so magnetic people will do precisely what you tell them to do.
If you do your homework (it’s not brain surgery but requires some diligence), you’ll end up being an incredibly well-spoken persuasive person. You’ll still be you, only more compelling and influential.
Don’t cheap out! You’re worth it!
It’s so true! I do get a bit frustrated when something felt clear in my mind but then when it came out it sounded like gibberish! Or sometimes it doesn’t come out at all. Very insightful that it’s like translating your ideas into a different language.
It happens to everyone!
Thank you for your kind words š
In order to deliver my thoughts concisely during the class I prepare a speech in written format and read it out. I am unable to speak on the spot. And I am tired of the process. Moreover, English is not my first language. Is this the article which can help me speak better without preparing for it beforehand?
Yes, VSK! I agree that is exhausting, and a nice way to start, but you can do this off the cuff. The solution is to assess your skills. Let’s get you in for a consult, we can chat about what you’re doing and talk to you about your options.
Warm regards,
Ita
Hello
I am from India and I also face the same problem. I am really happy by knowing that this can be solved. But the cost is really high for me. May I request to give some more discount please.
Just ask the person you’re speaking to next if they ever have the same thing happen to them. IF they ever have a clear idea that comes out less powerful than they wanted it to. It happens to everyone!
Yes, I have to work on being concise. But I didn’t realize you could work on your story. Getting on it.
It drives me crazy when I hear people tell a story and their sentences are 5 miles long.
It happens so much, Kara. Almost everyone needs to work on being more concise, but for some reason, all my clients think they’re alone! That they’re the only ones.
“We can have ideas crystalized in our minds; however, conveying them to others involves translation.” This right here. I hadn’t ever thought of it as translating for myself (or for my brain, haha), but you’re so right. I often fumble with words because I haven’t fully thought out what I was going to say. I love your advice to “talk slowly,” so simple, but so impactful. Loving your advice in your articles!
My biggest challenge is when I get asked something that i have not prepared for , then I feel like I cant digest the question quick enough and response with the answer that I want to give. ( usually I will have better answer after I do the reflection at the end of it ) š¤£
Very normal!
I’m unable to articulate my thoughts when I’m put on the spot by someone asking me a question; I feel like it holds me back. From reading your posts I think its because I’m always in a rush to answer to avoid any awkward silences. I agree that speaking slowly and delivering my message in chunks will help a lot. š
Yes!
This is so insightful! No one ever talks about this. I didn’t know it myself!
I sometimes find myself being unable to articulate my message and also in the receiving end of a story that is confusing.
I dunt think people realize that they can improve this.
No matter what you are thinking up there in your brain. It is nothing until it is converted into words in an articulated manner. Ha! I always feel like I know exactly what I’m going to say until I’m in the meeting. Then it doesn’t come out right. š Or even if I just tell a story. I seem to be unable to stop talking and no one gets my story. I’m going to try what you say, it’s obviously going to take some effort. I would love to deliver everything I have in my mind. Thank you for helping me in providing something to hold on to.
It doesn’t matter what you are thinking up stairs. It is nothing until it is converted into spoken words in an articulated manner. I have noted all your tips from building a narrative to recording yourself and assessing later. These a invaluable tips. Now it is up to me to practice these tips into action. I would love to deliver everything I have in my mind. I’ll be returning to take more tips on other areas I need improvement.
I have face this situation many times especially in formal conversation. I have many good ideas but I failed to express, also whenever I have any doubts I can’t put them in proper words. I sometimes think I myself make things complicated and then fail to deliver it. I m gonna your advice of articulating complex ideas into simpler way. THANK YOU!
I have face this situation many times especially in formal conversation. I have many good ideas but I failed to express, also whenever I have any doubts I can’t put them in proper words. I sometimes think I myself make things complicated and then fail to deliver it. I m gonna use your advice of articulating complex ideas into simpler way. THANK YOU!
Happens to me all the time ( hate it). I come up with the greatest speech for a presentation or even a reply to an email, but I put them on paper or even read it back to someone as practice , I go huh? i really need to get used to relaxing and recording myself . That way I can hear how it sounds and make changes which should eventually help in making the ‘speech’ my own story.
So insightful. I never really thought about it like this. I feel like my thoughts are pretty genius but then when I try to speak them they come out all wrong. Like too many words, too fast, I mumble or so I’m told, the list goes on.
I’ve read nearly all of your articles and they’ve taught me so much.
Mastering expressiveness will transform how we communicate. Itās not just about the words we use; itās how you say them that captures attention and drives your message home. People connect deeply with emotion, and itās the emotion behind our words that leaves a lasting impact.
When you learn to express yourself fully, you convey not just information but meaning and feelingāboth of which are what truly resonate with others. If you want people to care about what you’re saying, focus on how you say it. The right tone, energy, and emotion can move people in ways words alone never will.
Thank you for your generosity. You should have one of those buy me a coffee things!
I’ve always had this problem! I have my thoughts organized but when I try to speak them in meetings they don’t come out the way I think them. People talk about articulation but like you say there’s a difference between being articulate and articulation. And I like the steps you lay out, they make perfect sense! Thank you for this! Glad I found you!